5 December 2025
Stanzas from the Great Greek Comedy of Pat & Gabrielle
I. The Awakening of Zeus
At dawn’s first gloom, the phone cried out—
a shriek fit to rouse the dead.
Thus spoke the scroll of warnings grim:
“SEVERE WEATHER. SEEK SHELTER.”
But our heroines, seasoned by airports and fate,
merely sipped their coffee.
For they knew:
when Zeus is unhappy, travelers must simply pack an umbrella
and keep moving.
II. The Rain of the Thunderer
Down from Olympus he hurled his tantrum—
sheets of rain,
bolts of light,
winds howling like angry museum curators
denied their lunch break.
Yet Pat and Gabrielle, unbowed,
strapped on their shoes
and declared boldly:
“We have climbed through worse metaphorical storms.
Let us face an actual one.”
III. The Ascent of the Sacred Steps
Upward they trekked,
climbing stone steps slick with the sky’s tears.
Waters rushed beside them—
the very cliffs of Meteora weeping in sympathy
or possibly laughter.
Tourists huddled in corners, muttering prayers
to Wi-Fi and ponchos.
But our heroines pressed on,
undaunted,
undaunted,
undaunted!
IV. The Monastery in the Mist
At last they reached the holy heights,
wrapt in fog like the breath of ancient monks.
Lightning flashed.
Thunder grumbled.
Somewhere, a stray cat judged them silently.
But Pat and Gabrielle stood triumphant,
hair damp, spirits high,
as if crowned by the gods
for sheer stubbornness.
V. Return to the Hearth
Back to the hotel they descended,
puddles swirling around their feet,
streets running like tiny chaotic rivers.
The hearth crackled; the air warmed.
“Flooding may occur,” the officials warned.
“To which we say,” replied Pat,
“Add it to the list.”
VI. The Unshakable Will of Travelers
For these two have survived
snowbound Duluth,
ORD in meltdown,
Death-By-GPS farm roads,
parking curses,
tractor blockades,
and one suspiciously haunted gas station.
What is a little rain
compared to that?
VII. The Chorus Speaks
Hear us, mortals:
This is no tragedy.
This is a comedy of epic proportion—
a tale sung by bards
and airline customer-service survivors.
Pat and Gabrielle journey onward
toward wine, warmth,
and dry socks.
VIII. The Promise of Athens
And though the gods may toy with them still,
hurling storms like olives from a plate,
our heroines stride forward,
undaunted and unstoppable,
knowing this truth:
Every Greek Odyssey worth telling
starts as a disaster
and ends with laughter.
